Thursday, May 10, 2012

The newest news that I know.

Let's talk about what I should be doing.

WHY must I have homework due (and lots of it!!) when important things happen in my life?

Seven days ago, I was fired from a job that I hated. Today, I was called by two new employers looking to hire me; one of which was in Tallahassee, the other of which was in Charlotte.

For all those not up-to-date on our business, we have spent the last week putting in dozens (literally) of applications. To be safe, we put in a few for Tallahassee. But we'd been hopeful that God would give us the opportunity to use this "end" as a new beginning. For a week, I've been praying hard, and asking for direction. When I got the call today about the position in North Carolina, I couldn't have been more ecstatic...or more sure that this is what we were supposed to be doing. I was practically screaming my excitement at David. And the job is perfect! More about that when it feels more real. For now, I just want to cry. So much to do in so little time. Leaving everything behind. Moving to a new place where I don't know anyone. Ya know.

So now it's that really annoying part of reality where I have to start thinking about expenses and have to make sure we have somewhere to live in the next week. We've got lots to pack, lots to toss, and lots to prepare for. Coming to Tallahassee was liberating because I knew I'd be out of my parents house, and on to new things. But sh** just got real, fools! For the first time, I'm taking a [monstrous] leap of faith without having much security. Soon, I'll be catching you up from our (gasp!) couch in our new apartment. What?

Oh, and while I have you here:


That seems to be the real issue (for the people we've told) with this whole moving in together thing. *Gag* Dealing with his night gas is enough. To damn myself for the rest of my life is a big step that I'm not willing to take just yet. But seriously. Let me help you off that high horse. I've been there, done that. Everyone remember Justin? Too soon, people. Too soon.

Moving right along.

If you're local and want to help, it would be much appreciated. We need some serious lifting and packing assistance. I believe we were talking about getting the truck on Saturday morning (19th) and heading out the same day. Unfortunately, this cuts into our first 5kness. Obviously, we can't be caught up worrying about 5king when we're planning on moving the same day. Priorities, right? Priorities and sadness. Speaking of fitness, I haven't run in what feels like forever. Homework and working out. Two things I have not attended to at all this week. Excellent.


Brett S. said...

Interesting. I would think that having been engaged before ("been there done that") would convince you of the need to not exalt a relationship before its time. It seems like this is a hasty move based more on convenience than commitment, and I will be surprised if it works well under that pretense. I'm also surprised you are approaching the move with such a flippant attitude, as if it really is nothing more than living with his night gas. Moving in with someone is a big deal, I would argue even more of a commitment than getting engaged. Unlike engagement, which is really just conceptual, living with someone is a very tangible and inescapable change (at least without considerable cost and scrambling to move somewhere new if things go south). I would hope that before you did this you would recognize that. If you don't, I doubt the engagement with Justin gave you much insight into serious, committed relationships.

But I wish you the best of luck in your new job, and hope that everything works for the best for you and Dave. I haven't known you for very long, but I really looked up to Dave when we were kids (not that I don't now, but the age difference seems less on this side of adolescence) and truly hope that things go well for both of you.


Samantha said...

Brett, darling, if you would like to talk to David, please do. The people who know me understand my intense level of sarcasm and hilarity to be somewhat of a defense mechanism. My apologies for being so "flippant", as it were.

Andrea K. said...

I, like everyone else, do want to share my opinion. Please don't be harsh in response, I promise that I'm not trying to be critical.

I see no problem with you wanting to move in with David without being married. You know your relationship and what's right for you in your life. Nobody else can make that call; they aren't you, they haven't lived your life, and we are all unique beings for a reason. I think the part about this blog that is concerning is, as Brett said, how flippant you seem about moving in. Maybe it is for a humorous effect, but it doesn't necessarily read that way. I like how in your next blog you do mention that you and David have a good, healthy, strong relationship, and I think that's the part that most people aren't seeing. Even though you aren't getting engaged, you are taking your relationship to a new level. You mention this frequently, but especially now don't be afraid to let people know that you and David are serious and are moving things forward, even if it's not the way people wish it was.

I'm honestly not trying to criticize, more just try to read between the lines and solve some of the gaps as to why people are giving you said backlash. I also think that you're focusing on fighting people as to why you aren't getting engaged. Don't worry about that, and instead embrace the fact that you and David are progressing in your relationship, even if it's not how they choose. If people can see that you are making a step forward in your relationship, maybe they'll lay off. I don't know.

Does this make sense? If any of this reads as attacking, re-read it imagining me being more questioning, because that's how it's being written, lol.

Samantha said...

I'm not upset with you, Andrea! Thanks for your comment. I think the reason I've been so aggravated has been because I don't feel that I should have to justify moving in together by talking about how committed we are to each other. We're uprooting from everything and everyone we know. We're taking on a heavy load with a ridiculously high rent...and all the other bills. Everything is changing. Every moment, every dollar, every day--it counts! To assume that I would go into this without considering the implications and consequences really demeans my character. I'm sure people criticize that I don't understand commitment because I ended my engagement with Justin. But if you woke up to someone standing at the foot of your bed at 4 am or someone who spreads dirty rumors behind your back, you would understand the day to day struggle I went through while trying to make it work. But I never shared how crazy he was. I barely talked about the breakup in consideration of his "good name". And for that, people didn't get the dirty details. It seemed sudden and uncalled for. But really, I was just trying to keep our mutual friends neutral and unbiased.

And the same goes for David. I don't think it's anyone's business how much I love David, or the ways in which he cares for me. (Not a stab at you!) We're not into PDA, and we're not writing love songs for the world to hear. We keep our business private. We felt that it was important to mention leaving rather than just head out without saying a word. This is a fun, exciting, adventurous time in our lives, albeit incredibly stressful. And I find it therapeutic to use humor to counter anxiety. Even having to justify that upsets me. If you "know" me well enough to say something about how I approach a situation (again, not a stab at you), then you should already understand the method to my madness. Everyone who knows us intimately have been so supportive and exalts our decision to move forward with our relationship. It's really only the people who don't know us who find this strange and chaotic.

I do appreciate your insight, in the same way that I appreciate Brett's. I know that behind whatever words, there's mostly just concern. Thanks for taking the time to comment.