|He needed to be tickled to force this smile, but alas!|
|My adorable JB at Mission San Luis.|
After much consideration and meditation with Him, I've come to grips with the reality I'm facing with Paul. Having lost sight of my path for an instant, I was afraid that his return to Tallahassee was inevitable, and the end of my relationship with JB would come simply as a repercussion of the situation. But Paul is looking for an easy out, and I won't be as weak as I have been in the past. This "goodbye" was the "goodbye" and there is no chance I'm looking back. It is always nice to hear that someone is empty without you, though. Never get tired of hearing that. I can forgive, but I will never forget.
Justin Brown, I adore you. And no matter what Paul decides to do, it will never sway my feelings for you. Only one man has that kind of power over me! And I firmly believe that He ousted Paul from my life in the first place.....and all over again when I hadn't learned my lesson. It's been a tough adjustment to a new relationship: including two people who are more ready for the future than they have even had time to figure out the other person in it.
But the love is here.
And God is present between us.
We have years to figure out the flaws that make each other unique. I look forward to marrying a man who is not searching for perfection, but sees me with all my faults and still thinks of me as perfect. Where ever He takes me, whoever He hands me off to: I am His servant. And I am so glad.